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Things you do differently with your second born

  1. Sleep
  2. Change diapers less often… oops
  3. Bathe less often
  4. Bathe baby less often
  5. Let them cry more
  6. Realize your extra baby mattress protector really belongs under you to block those night time milk leaks
  7. Swaddle confidently
  8. Nurse more confidently
  9. Lay them down for naps vs cuddling
  10. Swerve societal pressures

SLEEP

If you’ve read any of our other posts, you’ve probably noted that I hardly slept when our first, Ivy, was born. I was so paranoid. I come from a line of worry warts, it’s literally in my blood. If she wasn’t sleeping, what did I eat? Did I give her stomach ache because I inhaled a family sized bag of BBQ chips today? Did she not get enough milk when she nursed 7 minutes and 33 seconds ago? Are her socks too tight? When she was sleeping… *wakes up Ian* is she still breathing? They’re so quiet when they aren’t crying. I better go check *fumbles out of bed into the brisk Midwest February bedroom air to discover she is breathing, gets back in bed, complains about to chill of my sheets, force cuddles spouse for warmth. Repeat after a 30-minute nap.

So this time around, we swaddle little baby Rae right out of the gate. She spent her first night in the nursery with the wonderful nursing staff. Ian went home to care for Ivy and I slept like a rock for 2-3 hour increments. Pure bliss. A room to myself. No snores. No crying. Just the gentle buzz of hospital noises. I had great nurses… so I subdued the roaring Cave of Wonder’s Tiger that stirred deep down inside me.

Cave of Wonders from Aladdin – my labor & delivery spirit animal.

DIAPERING

With my new found parenting confidence, I mean we kept Ivy alive and relatively uninjured (no hospital visits, just a goose egg or two managed at home – no signs or symptoms of brain injury, don’t worry ☺️), I felt the pressure to be perfect slip away. And by slip away I mean like an ice cream cone that’s melting close to the sun… a hard plop to the ground of normalcy. When Ivy was new I felt like I had to be right there at every peep. Change every diaper instantly. Feed her inconspicuously but with great eagerness; you know to please both sides of the breastfeeding views. I’ve learned my lesson with trying to change Rae right after she goes… more is coming. Just wait a moment. Yep. Pee or more. Obviously, each kiddo is different. Mine prefers urinating when you’re trying to hurry out the door or in a fresh diaper or when her sister is screaming from (her perceived) starvation. To sum it up, you’re not a horrible parent if your kid’s diaper is wet for a bit. Or if you hold off on a poop change for a few minutes while you wait out the sneaky second take.

After wrangling a toddler, changing a new baby is nothing.

SHOWERING

In the midst of the chaos of transition to two, I found myself noticing weird smells around the house. A regular culprit… was me. Poor Ian came in for a hug one day, pulled back and asked if that smell was me. Yes. Yes, it is. I knew it was really bad when I noticed my milky BO scent amongst all the other smells at the state fair. How pungent it must have been to fight its way through animal poops & fried food… but look how cute Ivy’s overalls were! She HAD to wear them that day.

Our Iowa State Fair adventure 2018. Ivy’s second state fair and Rae’s first. It was filled with family support as we all took turns herding and chasing down Ivy. Rae was an easy keeper as she slept through 90% of the day. Although she was the topic of most discussions with strangers. The sweet encouraging glances and congratulations outnumbered the unnecessary “two weeks and she’s at the fair?!” statements. My poor future sister in law happened to be holding her during the most uncomfortable comments. First, someone woman asked if that baby was real. Whaaaaa.

The second and most challenging statement, “I don’t like how you’re holding that baby. I don’t like her color.” I’ll continue to tell myself she was well-meaning; expressing a concern for a child’s health. She then shared how she was a nurse for many years, thank you for your service, and all her baby experience. Sweet, patient sister in law even asked how the woman would prefer her to hold Rae… “just not that way!” OKAY. So you charge up a complete stranger but don’t have the time to educate them? Let’s move on… Ian wasn’t our with us so I’m assuming she had no idea Rae was biracial which would explain why Rae’s coloring did not match the three white adults she was with at the time. I’ll just leave that there for now. Probably deserves its own post in the future.

BATHING BABIES

Ivy experienced stinky milk neck on the regular. The let down is heavy and the poor thing almost drowned daily. Rae is no exception. Instead of filling the baby tub, getting everything sorted while Ivy is helping, I grab a washcloth and wipe through those double chins and neck creases. She only gets a traditional bath every three to four days. Strategic timing of baths comes into play now. Ivy loves being involved with Rae for which I am grateful. However, it does add an element of difficulty. Extra tiny hands and a lack of awareness to her own strength poses potential risks for a tiny baby sister. Some nights, when I’m too worn out to carefully guide Ivy’s help, we wait until Ivy is asleep for Rae’s bath.
*Rae is now three months and chonky. Our newest strategy for double bath time involves Ivy playing in the tub with a sneaky dunk of Rae in the other end. Ivy still longs to help… which occasionally presents itself has pushing Rae deeper into the water… 

While people feel guilty about taking attention away from the firstborn as the second comes, I felt bad for number two. Not nearly as many snuggly naps; must put down baby to feed, clean, love on the toddler… as soon as I start feeling guilty I remind myself that each child is different. They have different needs, strengths, and weaknesses. They were given specifically to me to raise and love at the perfect time *whether that aligned with my plans or not.

So no beating yourself up. No comparing to how you did things the first time. As long as both are fed and relatively clean and deeply loved, they’ll be just fine.

How Many Burp Cloths Do I need
Cute Articles

How Many Burp Cloths Do I Need?

It is easy when getting ready for a new child to enter this world to get distracted by all the new gadgets you can buy like corner shelves for baby monitors, baby gates, electronic mobile, and all the other crazy gadgets you can get. You may end up forgetting to get some of the basics like burp clothes. Then you think about it and wonder “how many burp cloths do I need?” It is a great question and to put a long story short as a father; you cannot have too many. If you’re a mother, you can do with a few less then me, but you still will need a few.

 

How Many Burp Cloths Do I Need – Stock Them Everywhere

You want to have burp cloths everywhere. You never know where you will need one or why but having one handy is helpful. If you are thinking of getting 4 or 5 burp clothes, those are rookie numbers! Here are all the places you can potentially use one.

  • Living Room
  • Kitchen table
  • Babies Room
  • Basinet
  • Bathroom
  • Multiple for Diaper Bag
  • A few in all of your cars (double this number if you have leather seats and triple it if your car costs more than $40,000)
  • Whoever else watches your kid should have a few, so they are still down to watch your kid

The locations you could need a burp cloth are endless. My wife was smart, and she knows that she needed to put them close to all the things that I use a lot, so I never had an excuse to not clean up messes.

  • My computer
  • My bookshelves
  • She probably thought about gluing a pack to my phone as well, but I would not allow it
How many burp cloths do I need?
Ian and Ivy Chiling

How Many Burp Cloths Do I Need – They Are Not Just For Spitting

When our first daughter was born, it was shocking to me how easily milk could spray everywhere when my wife was feeding. One second Ivy was getting milk the next second she is smiling happily at y wife which is great, but then milk would be spraying everywhere. Luckily we had the burp cloths ready, so the mess was minimal.

Reasons you need a burp cloth

  • During feeding
  • For any Spilled milk
  • After feeding
  • Drolling
  • Sneezing
  • Unwanted food that is getting spit back up

 

How Many Burp Clothes Do I Need?Laundry

The last thing you need to think about in this whole burp clothe equation is how often do you plan to do laundry? The burp cloths you use will get dirty quickly so if you want to have less then 7, you need to be prepared to do the laundry pretty often.

That is not always realistic for most people. It sounds excellent like using reusable diapers, but a lot of people don’t find it practical once the time comes. If that looks like you, then aim to have about 20 burp cloths. You will misplace a few and some just get so nasty you throw them out. Before you know it, you will be down to 15 or less.

Not all of them need to be adorable but when life gets messy, clean up can be made a little more enjoyable with something you love.

 

 

 

 

 

Baby Mobile
Cute Articles

Baby Mobile – Do You Need One? Read This First

You may be thinking that you need to get a baby mobile because you see other people have them. They are a classic baby item to buy, and your crib may feel empty without one. On the other hand, they do seem kind of like a waste of money at times. Is your baby’s life going to be better as a result of buying this thing that hands over them? We will make sure you know both sides of the story so you can make a good choice.

To Buy a Baby Mobile Or Not to Buy?

I will say this right off the bat, my wife and I did not buy one. I was in the “why in the world would any human buy one of these things” camp. It seemed stupid to me. I will tell a story to illustrate why I was wrong.

One day when my daughter Ivy decided she was going to give me a real hard time. My wife was traveling for work, so it was just me on daddy duty. I was cooking, and I saw my daughter had the remote. I made a mental note to get it from her, but I had to stir the food one more time.

Before you know it, I look back at her, and the remote is GONE! I spent the next four hours on and off looking for this stupid remote. With my wife being gone the house was so quiet, I needed the TV this week. The reason I could not find it was because it was too hard for me to think like a 12-month-old child. I was searching like an adult in places that adults would lose things.

Baby Mobile

Think Like a Baby When It Comes to The Baby Mobile

If you are thinking that getting a baby mobile is a bad idea it is most likely because you are struggling to think like a baby. Having something hanging over your bed to keep your attention span is stupid for an adult because a bed is a place to sleep. For a baby, a crib is more than a place to relax and rest, though as parents we wish it was.

When my wife made her first baby mobile for Cute Yute, I remember she asked me to the hold it for some photos. This was also my daughter’s first interaction, and she was just amazed by this thing. It changed my perspective, and I decided on that day that if we are blessed with more kids, that we would get them a baby mobile.

I have never seen my daughter reach for anything as she tried grabbing for that baby mobile; it had her full attention, and that is saying a lot.

Baby Mobile Options

When you begin the baby mobile search know that there are a few different types, you can get. The possibilities are endless. If you have something custom, you want to be made just let Emily know, and she will get it done for you.

Baby Mobile

The options are endless regarding what you can do. A custom mobile is an excellent opportunity to match your nursery theme or give a special gift that reflects something unique within your relationship with mom and or dad.

For example, I should have Emily make a donut baby mobile for our next child. Donuts are a cornerstone of our relationship.

Cute Articles

Newborn Baby Headbands – Welcome to The Baby Headband World

If you are looking for some newborn baby headbands you have come to the right place.  The baby hand band life is really quite simple but when you welcome a new human to the world everything can be overwhelming. The one thing that can change any bad day is the smile of a cute baby, but when you throw a baby headband in the mix, things just get better!

Newborn Baby Headbands From a Fathers Perspective

If you ended up on this article you probably are not a father but our perspective matters and here is why. The more of these headbands lying around the easier it is for a father to dress his daughter and get her cute. Bet you didn’t think about that one eh? (excuse my Canadian)

When Ivy was born, I actually did not think about combing her hair and doing her hair much but I definitely could throw a headband on her. It was great because she looked great, she would not rip it off and it let people know that she was a girl because most people thought she was a boy.

I felt like having lots of headband options gave me hope. I think more fathers want to do everything they can, but mom, sometimes you gotta help a man. Put him in a position to succeed and he may just shock you.

Custom New Born Baby Headbands – Get The Baby Headband You Will Adore

If you have an idea of a fabric, print or color you would love to have on a headband. Cute Yute can do that for you. Email Emily (Cuteyutebabies@gmail.com) and she will get that taken care of for you.

The more specific you are in your request the more time it may take to find the material to build which will raise the price. If you want it, she will find it and make it happen for you. If you are going to get a bunch of headbands you may as well have some that no one else has.

Newborn Baby Headbands With a Matching Skirt

Newborn Baby Headbands - Welcome to The Baby Headband World

After you get a baby headband you can step it up to the next level by getting a matching skirt to go with it. At Cute Yute, we will take the same material made to make the headband and throw down a skirt to go with it. Not only will your daughter have a unique baby headband but she will also have a one in a kind skirt that will just melt hearts. The skirts are easy to put on. No buttons, zippers or anything else. The skirts are made with a simple elastic band.

 

Newborn Baby Headbands With Mother Headwrap to Match

 

For the last piece of baby headband fun, you can get yourself a head wrap to match the head wrap that your daughter has. We just did not want to leave you out of all the cuteness. That is not fair to the moms of the world. The headwrap for women is clearly larger than the newborn baby headbands but it can also be tied in a number of ways to fit your style. Who doesn’t love a mom and me matching set?!

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Finding a Way With My First Baby Mobile

Baby mobiles are one of those baby items that I skipped. I felt like it was just one more thing to spend money on and definitely did not make our “need it” list. Now, did I see mobiles that I thought were incredibly cute? YES. Did I try to convince myself that Ivy needed one? Yes. She is currently 16 months old and has survived without one. But I still wonder occasionally, did I make our lives more difficult by not giving it a shot?

No sense in worrying about what could have been, especially when it comes to sleep. What sleep was lost is lost and will never come back. I do regularly have the internal discussion with myself about joining Ivy for naps and the benefits that adequate sleep provides me as an individual and as a mother. I’d say I’m batting 500 in that debate.

Pinterest always finds a way to pop new adorable craft ideas into my feed. One of the more recent trends has been baby mobiles. There are so many beautiful products that I would love to indulge in but typically find myself checking out the DIY options with my money saving mind leading the way.

After looking at a few tutorials, I decided I was going to go for it. Making my own! My general plan was to use black and white scrap material I have to make some little critters, more than likely cats. The high contrast of black and white is best for babies eyes as they’re developing. I then found myself finding some beautiful more ornate mobiles. Now being honest, most of these seem geared towards mom’s decorative wants. Which I have zero problems with! Make that baby space a place where you feel happy and calm. Kids used to be raised on much less artificial stimulation than what we feel pressured to provide today. All the flashing lights and loud noises just seem a little over the top to me. Don’t misunderstand, Ivy definitely has toys that sing songs and flash. She loves her new xylophone grandpa just got her. She gets to beat on something and make pretty noises!

So with modern and minimalist moms in mind, I decided to keep an eye out for something special. I literally had no idea what I was looking for but felt confident that I would know it when I saw it. I was making one final lap around JoAnn’s when I stopped by the stringed beads. While I love shiny tiny cute things, I never buy beads so making this stop was entirely a gut feeling.

Poof! There they were – the cutest little round owl beads I had ever seen. Adorably shaped, delicately painted and all in a row. Literally, one line of thread held 11 little fluff balls. I mean how cute are they?

I grabbed an embroidery hoop, some natural looking hemp rope, and my little owl buddies and went to town! In classic mother mode, I was nervous about the potential choking hazard of the bead. I secured each of these bad boys with heart.

Super simplistic. I do have a tendency to go one… or two steps past the best stopping point in craft projects. I did consider adding some strips of ribbon, lace or fabric between the owls to add some more volume. But I restrained myself. If whoever wants to bring this baby mobile home would some extra cuteness added I’d happily do so!

Feeling like the baby mobile owls turned out well, I think I will try my scrap fabric cat idea next!